Analysis of the AP Government Argument Essay

This essay provides a strong model for constructing an argument essay on a complex political issue, specifically the abolition of the Electoral College. It demonstrates how to integrate historical context, political science concepts, and evidence to support a clear thesis. The essay is structured logically, moving from a general introduction of the issue to specific criticisms and potential solutions, culminating in a persuasive conclusion.

Thesis and Claim

The essay establishes a clear and assertive thesis in its introduction: 'This essay argues that the Electoral College should be abolished, as it fundamentally undermines democratic principles of representation, distorts campaign incentives, and can lead to outcomes that lack broad popular legitimacy.' This thesis acts as a roadmap for the entire essay, signaling the main points of contention that will be explored. The claim is further solidified by the concluding statement, reinforcing the argument for a national popular vote system.

Evidence and Support

The essay effectively uses several types of evidence: * Constitutional References: It cites Article II, Section 1 of the Constitution to explain the basis of electoral vote allocation. * Statistical Comparisons: The essay uses population figures and electoral vote counts for Wyoming and California to illustrate the disproportionate representation per capita. * Historical Context: It references the compromises made by the Founding Fathers, including those related to slavery and logistical challenges, to explain the origins of the Electoral College and argue why these justifications are now outdated. * Real-World Examples: The elections of 2000 and 2016 are mentioned as critical instances where the popular vote winner lost the presidency, serving as potent examples of the system's perceived flaws. * Political Science Concepts: Terms like 'winner-take-all system,' 'swing states,' 'faithless electors,' and 'national popular vote' are used appropriately to frame the discussion within the discipline.

Organization and Structure

The essay follows a standard, effective argumentative structure: 1. Introduction: Sets the stage, introduces the Electoral College debate, and presents the clear thesis statement. 2. Body Paragraphs (Thematic): Each paragraph focuses on a distinct argument against the Electoral College: * Disproportionate representation (per capita weighting). * The impact of the winner-take-all system and its effect on voter turnout and campaign focus. * Historical context and the obsolescence of original justifications. * The issue of faithless electors and distorted national discourse. 3. Discussion of Alternatives: Briefly outlines proposed solutions like the national popular vote and the National Popular Vote Interstate Compact. 4. Conclusion: Restates the thesis in new words, summarizes the main arguments, and offers a final persuasive appeal for abolition.

Tone and Style

The tone is formal, objective, and persuasive, suitable for an academic argument. It avoids overly emotional language while still conveying a strong sense of conviction. The use of precise terminology and clear sentence structures enhances its credibility. Contractions are avoided, maintaining a formal academic register. The author uses transition words and phrases (e.g., 'Furthermore,' 'Moreover,' 'In conclusion') to ensure smooth flow between ideas.

Revision Opportunities

  • Deeper Dive into Alternatives: While alternatives are mentioned, a more detailed comparison of their pros and cons could strengthen the argument for the preferred solution (national popular vote).
  • Counterarguments: Acknowledging and refuting potential counterarguments (e.g., the protection of small states) would make the essay even more robust. For instance, one could argue that protecting small states is less important than ensuring majority rule, or that small states already have disproportionate power in the Senate.
  • Specific Data Points: While the Wyoming/California example is good, including more specific data on voter turnout disparities in swing vs. non-swing states, or the financial resources spent on swing states, could add further weight.
  • Nuance on Historical Context: While the essay correctly identifies the problematic origins related to slavery, a brief acknowledgment of other founding era concerns (like fear of direct democracy) could add nuance, even if ultimately dismissed.
Integrating Evidence: The 'One Person, One Vote' Principle

Instead of just stating 'the Electoral College is unfair,' the essay demonstrates how it is unfair by referencing the constitutional basis for elector allocation and then providing concrete statistical examples. The sentence, 'This system means that states with smaller populations receive a disproportionately larger number of electors per capita than larger states. For instance, Wyoming, with a population of roughly 580,000, has three electoral votes, giving each elector approximately 193,000 constituents. California, with a population exceeding 39 million, has 54 electoral votes, meaning each elector represents about 722,000 constituents,' directly supports the claim of disproportionate representation. This specific data makes the abstract concept of unfairness tangible and persuasive.